


there's enough for all of us

by linechange (anaklotho)



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Humor, M/M, Minor Character Death, Road Trips, it's a mad mad mad mad world au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:08:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26414683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anaklotho/pseuds/linechange
Summary: For Gon and Killua, it was the big road trip they'd always wanted to take. For Leorio, it was a relaxing beach vacation with his best friend. For Kurapika, it was Leorio's relaxing beach vacation in which he himself was an unwilling participant. For Ging and Pariston, well...But fate has other things in store, and several car wrecks, two chartered planes, one fist-fight, and $350,000 dollars later, the travelers find themselves in a place they never thought they’d be. It’s the little detours, after all.It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World AU
Relationships: Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Kurapika/Leorio Paladiknight
Comments: 7
Kudos: 51





	1. Chapter 1

The sun beat down on the dusty highway. 

Two police cars were in pursuit of another smaller, faster car. It was red, and smeared with grime, and not far from being on its last legs. With a final rev and a cloud of dust, it ran itself right off the highway, down into the ravine below. There was a crash and a sickening sound of twisting metal.

In a few hours, three other cars would come upon it. 

. . .

“Gon!” Killua shouted, over the noise of the road and of the whooshing wind. “Did you see that?”

“See what?”

“That car down there! It must’ve gone clean over the side.” Gon threw his nature magazine down and stood up out of his seat. “Wait, I do see it! Pull over, Killua.”

Killua threw him a skeptical glance. “I think we should let the police deal with it, Gon. Or probably the morgue at this point.” 

Gon huffed. “C’mon. What if we’re just in time? He could be dying down there!”

“Alright, alright.”

One car back, a blond young man and his friend were engaged in a heated debate.

“We took this vacation to relax, can’t you put that aside for a bit?”

“Actually, I can’t, Leorio. This is due tonight.” 

Leorio groaned. He turned to survey the landscape in front of them, and gasped. 

“What is it?”

“There’s a man down there! He looks like he’s in trouble.”

Kurapika leaned over to look. “Can you help him?”

“Worth a shot.”

A ways back on the road, an entirely different conversation was taking place. 

“Oh, my.”

“What is it now? Your hairspray go on sale?”

“It looks to me like that man down there is in an awful jam.”

Ging turned to look. As they rounded the curve he got a very clear view of the smoking wreckage down below. “Give me those binoculars.”

“Please, he said.” Ging ignored Pariston and peered down through the binoculars. An elderly man lay prone a few yards from the wreck. 

“Damn.” He passed the binoculars back to Pariston. “I’d say he’s done for.”

“What, we’re not going to go down there and help him?” 

Ging paused. Pariston raised his eyebrows at him. 

“Do you know something?”

Pariston just smiled and gestured to the valley. “Let’s just see what our poor friend down there has to say.”

. . . 

The six of them descended into the valley. Gon and Killua were the first down. Gon sprinted over the rough terrain like it was nothing and seized the old man’s hands. 

“Hey! Are you alright? What can I do?”

The old man coughed and regarded Gon with bleary eyes. “I don’t think…I’m going to make it.” Gon’s eyes welled up with tears. Killua stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder. 

The old man regarded the gathered crowd. Ging stood off to the side. Pariston shook his head sadly and let a few crocodile tears fall. Gasping, Leorio made it to the bottom and ran to the old man’s side, Kurapika trailing warily behind him. 

“Hey. I’m a doctor. I’m just going to-“

“It’s no use,” wheezed the old man. “Just..be quiet and listen to me. There’s….a treasure.”

Everyone’s eyes went wide. 

“That’s right…so much dough….$350,000 dollars of it. And it’s all buried…under the big W in Santa Rosita State Park.”

“The big W,” Kurapika echoed. Leorio turned to see him furrowing his brow. Pariston’s eyes were still suspiciously wide, and Ging gave him a sideways glance. 

“It’s all yours…all of it…if you can get to it.”

“Hey, don’t talk,” Gon cut in. He turned to Leorio. “Mister, you said you were a doctor. Can you-“

Leorio shook his head. “I’m sorry, kid.”

The old man turned to Gon. “I had a good run…all that’s left is to…get rid of the money. If the cops come asking about it… don’t-“ he wheezed. Killua put his arms around Gon and pulled him back. The old man coughed again, and lay still. 

Gon lowered his head. Killua reached forward and closed the old man’s eyes. Then he turned to the others with an unreadable expression. “Well, you heard the old man. $350,000…and he wanted us to have it. I think-“

Pariston cleared his throat. Everyone turned to him. “I…for one…on this tragic occasion…to honor his memory, will say nothing to any inquiring authorities.”

Ging snorted. “Same for me.”

Kurapika stepped forward and cast a disapproving look at them. “Are we sure that what he said was true? Often, before they pass...people have been known to talk nonsense.”

“He seemed lucid, “ Leorio cut in. He scowled at the ground. “Don’t know why he’d choose a bunch of greedy strangers to give his money to, but that’s what it is.”

“Guys,” Killua said quietly. Everyone looked to where he pointed. At the top of the valley, three police cars had pulled over. A man in a black and white suit was making his way down to them. 

“Alright everyone,” said Pariston cheerfully. “Not a word about the money.”

. . . 

Aside from a nearly disastrous slip on Gon’s part, the six witnesses went away confident that the police knew nothing about the money. Whether it was real at all, however, was a different story. 

“Do you think it’s real?” Gon asked Killua. Everyone was back in their cars, making a distinct effort to appear as though the money was the last thing on their minds. 

Killua frowned. “Hard to say it’s not.”

“Couldn’t it have been some kind of.. practical joke?”

Killua huffed out a laugh. “A practical joke? That guy was laying there with every bone in his body broken. Don’t think he’d want to play a practical joke on complete strangers.”

“Hmm.” 

Killua glanced over at Gon. He still seemed a bit shaken by the old man’s death. 

“Hey,” Killua started. “That’s really a ton of money. With that we could-“

“I know,” Gon sighed. He reached forward and peered into the rearview mirror. “Uh, Killua?”

“Mmm?”

“You might want to speed up a little.”

. . . 

“I don’t know about you, Peeks, but that sort of money could make my life a whole lot easier.”

“Mm.”

“I’d be willing to make a fair split with the others…but I don’t know that those other guys would be. Well, the kids are probably willing. It’s more the…”

“The suspiciously well dressed man and his friend?”

“Yeah.” Leorio studied Kurapika. The corner of his mouth had pulled up into a little smirk. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure there’s a fair split. And if all else fails, well…”

“Well what?”

Kurapika shrugged. “I’ll just have to take matters into my own hands.”

Leorio gulped. The last time Kurapika had said that, they had woken up in jail. 

“Hey, it'd be nice, but let’s not get carried away here.”

“Oh, I don’t think we’re the ones getting carried away at the moment.”

Leorio turned around in his seat. The glittery man and his friend were gaining on them.

. . . 

The three cars traced each other around the bend. It was really a beautiful day: clear blue skies, seventy degrees, a long view of the horizon and into the valley. It was a little hard to focus on the beauty when you were rapidly accelerating to unreasonable speeds around a curve, however. 

“What the hell are they trying to pull?” Killua muttered. “We can’t keep this up forever.”

Gon glanced over worriedly. Killua had a firm grip on the wheel, and Gon knew that he could manage a car at well over the legal limit with ease. He didn’t know if the others could. 

“Well, I suppose if the others lose control and die in a fiery wreck, the money’s ours.”

“Killua!”

“Hey, I’m just telling it like it is. I’m not the one pushing two other cars to 90 miles an hour over a rumor of treasure.”

Gon turned around in his seat. If anyone still thought the money was fake, they weren’t showing it. It was them in the lead, the doctor and his friend behind them, and finally the man in the suit and his companion, gradually speeding up. No one was letting the others overtake them. 

“What should we do?” Gon muttered. 

Then, suddenly, the car in the rear began to slow. 

“Oh, what’re they doing now?” Killua’s eyes flicked to the rearview mirror. 

“Should we go talk to them?”

Killua sighed. “Might as well, unless we want to worry about them all the way to Santa Rosita.”

. . . 

All three cars pulled off the road, into a dusty, abandoned lot. The roaring of traffic from the road was the only sound. 

Pariston flung open the door and stumbled out, laughing. Gon and Killua walked side by side to the center of the lot, cautiously. Ging slammed the passenger side door and muttered something about how he was perfectly fine with managing a car at high speeds. Kurapika and Leorio were the last to reach the center of the lot. Once they were all assembled, Pariston stepped forward and spread his hands apologetically. 

“Well, friends, that certainly got a little crazy! I thought my dear friend Ging and I-”

“-not your friend-“

“were going to die at one point! So I said to myself, ‘we’re all reasonable people. Why don’t we just stop for a little while and discuss?’ The floor is yours.”

No one said a word. Killua kicked at a rock with his expensive shoes. Leorio looked around like he’d been left on Mars. At length Kurapika stepped forward. 

“The thing to do, obviously, is to split the money evenly. If that’s amenable to you all-“ he looked pointedly at Pariston, “we should agree, drive down there at legal speeds, and each get an equal share.”

“That’s a wonderful plan, Mr.-“

“Kurapika.”

“Mr. Kurapika,” Pariston started.

“Kurapika is my first name.”

“Well what’s your last name, then?”

Kurapika didn’t say anything. Pariston shrugged and continued. 

“Anyway, there’s only one problem with it, that I can see. Two of the assembled witnesses look to be… well… children.”

“You little-” Killua muttered. 

“I’m not sure they'd even know what to do with the money, or who it would pass to if they acquired it. Frankly, I’m not even sure how they’re driving, but I’m not one to pry. I propose, therefore, that we split the money unequally. The smallest share for the two little children, a slightly larger share for you two teens, and the largest share for Ging and I, who are reasonable adults.”

Kurapika started forward with a murderous look in his eyes, but Leorio put an arm in front of him. 

“If that’s not amenable to you all-“ Pariston said with a grin, “I do have an alternate proposal.”

“Yes?” Kurapika’s voice was almost inaudibly strained. 

Pariston smiled. “And that is simply every man for himself!”

“Alright, alright!” Leorio stepped into the center of the circle. “Hold on, everybody.” 

Killua, standing in the corner with Gon, sighed in defeat. This was going to be interesting. 

“If everyone would just calm down,” Leorio continued. Killua raised his eyebrows, elbowed Gon in the side. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” he whispered. 

Gon didn’t turn or reply, but Killua thought he felt him tense ever so slightly. He was ready to bolt. 

“There’s enough for all of us,” Leorio continued, seemingly oblivious to Kurapika leaning down to pick up his bag and pull it over his shoulder, or to the manic glee that Pariston couldn’t quite keep from spreading slowly across his face. 

“There’s enough for you-“

Killua braced himself. 

“And you,”

They were all backing away from each other. 

“And him, and me, and-“

“Run, Gon!” Killua shouted. 

“Oh, screw it!” Leorio exclaimed. 

And then they were all sprinting, Killua vaulting over the passenger side door of their car and landing in the driver’s seat, engines roaring to life, tearing away down the dusty road.


	2. Chapter 2

“Oh, the nerve of that man!” Kurapika shouted, loud enough to hear over the wind that was rushing rapidly past their speeding car. 

“Kurapika! Slow down!” Leorio yelled. After negotiations had broken down rather spectacularly, Kurapika and Leorio had somehow managed to make it ahead of the other cars.

“I’ll show him who’s reasonable! I’ll show him!” Kurapika continued, ignoring him. 

Leorio covered his face with his hands and groaned. 

“I tell them, ‘let’s do this reasonably,’” Kurapika spat out. “I say ‘equal shares’ like a reasonable man would, and they just don’t care! So now,” he gripped the steering wheel, his knuckles whitening. “I’m going to show them what kind of a man they're dealing with!”

Leorio could only nod weakly and hold on for dear life as the speedometer passed 90. He looked over at Kurapika. He was gripping the wheel like his life depended on it, his blond hair askew, a wild look in his eyes. Leorio had known his best friend could get a little…intense, if the situation called for it, but he’d never seen him quite like this. 

“Hey, Kurapika.”

“Yes?”

“You know what would be much faster than a car? And also out of our hands, speedwise?”

“Do tell, Leorio. I’m trying to focus here.”

Leorio took a deep breath. “A plane. There’s an airfield not far from here.”

Kurapika turned to Leorio with a look in his eyes that almost made Leorio regret suggesting it. “Good point, Leorio. Now we just have to outpace the others before the airfield.”

“Mmhmm.” That had not been what he was going for. “We could also drive there at a reasonable speed and let them pass us. Then they won’t know where we’re going and we’ll outpace them anyway by air.”

Kurapika considered. For a second, Leorio thought it had worked. 

But then Kurapika shook his head and pressed the gas with renewed vigor. “No. It’ll look too suspicious if we slow down suddenly. You’ll just have to hold on for a bit longer.”

Leorio closed his eyes and asked himself why he’d had to pick this exact week for their relaxing vacation. 

. . . 

Detective Mizaistom sat down at his desk and put his head in his hands. His office was filled to the brim with people, arguing, petitioning, and asking for updates. He’d tried to pick a quiet office in the corner, decorated it with plants, opened the windows for sunlight and fresh air. It hadn’t worked. He was more stressed than ever. 

“Mr Mizai!” Beans rushed into the office and threw a heap of papers onto his desk. “Is it true that we have a lead on the Netero case?”

“It’s true, Beans. He crashed his car this morning going 110 around a curve and died at the scene.”

Beans’ eyes welled up with tears. “Oh, Mr. Netero…”

“There were six witnesses. I couldn’t get anything out of them about the treasure… but Netero had to have said something. He’s a sly old man.”

“And we’re tracking those six as we speak,” a new voice said. Cheadle turned from the blackboard in the corner of the office, where a complicated diagram was being drawn up over a map of the area. “If any of them find the money, we’re sure to know about it.”

Beans nodded. “I see you’ve got it covered. Let me know if I can do anything to help.”

“I will, Beans.” Mizai stood and walked over to examine the diagram. Six witnesses, $350,000 dollars, the last plan of a crafty old man… something major was sure to happen. 

“Netero,” Mizai murmured. “What a life you had.”

. . .

Leorio and Kurapika had managed to maintain their lead over the other cars. They pulled off the road to the airfield in a cloud of dust. The man at the desk there looked them over a little skeptically, but had no qualms about letting them charter one of the planes.

“Wait! Wait for us!” came two voices. 

Leorio turned. Gon and Killua had swerved into the lot while they’d been distracted. They sprinted over.

Kurapika sighed. “Hello, boys. I’m sorry, but if you were looking to charter this plane we’re already done it.”

“Gah!” Gon stamped his foot. Killua just looked to the sky like he was asking how much worse this day could get. 

“We should be heading out, Leorio.” Kurapika said. 

“Yeah.” Leorio spared a glance back at Gon and Killua. They were already racing back to their pulled over car, kicking up dust and chattering rapidly at each other. 

“Leorio!” Kurapika grabbed his hand and pulled him along. “There’s no time for sentimentality. We’ve got to maintain our lead.”

“Yeah…” Leorio followed Kurapika around the back of the building, where their plane was waiting. It looked, well...

Their apparent pilot stood in a cloud of smoke, coughing and pulling his goggles over his head. A woman who seemed to be his wife was making him promise something and crying. The plane itself, which looked to be the source of all the smoke, was sputtering and whirring. It didn’t look to be able to fit more than two people. Nor did it look like it had been made past the year 1930. 

“Hey, Kurapika..” Leorio started. Kurapika ignored him and marched forward. 

“Hey, are you sure about this?”

“Of course, Leorio.” Kurapika was already throwing his bag into the seat in front. “What, do you think it’s unsafe?”

“Uh, maybe… a little bit.”

“Well, I’ll sort that out.” Kurapika turned to the pilot. “Sir, is this plane safe?”

“Safe as can be.”

“When was it made, would you say?”

“1915.”

Leorio burst into a fit of nervous laughter. Kurapika turned and glared at him. “Do you want to win this, or not?”

“I would like to survive this. I don’t know about winning.”

Kurapika took a deep breath. “Well, I’m going. You can come with or stay. It’s really perfectly safe. Do you think I’d take a chance with something like this?”

Leorio didn’t really have anything to say to that. With a groan, he threw his bag with Kurapika’s and climbed into the plane. 

. . . 

“That was low, even for you, I’ve gotta say,” said Ging. 

Pariston sighed. They’d been driving at a (relatively) reasonable speed and were pulling up the rear, but neither seemed too concerned. “And here I thought you appreciated a good hunt. What fun would it be to just drive down there calmly, split the money evenly, and call it a day? Where’s the excitement?”

“You’re insane.” Ging closed his eyes and leaned his seat back. “Wake me up when we’re close. I have no idea how you’re planning to pass all of them.”

“Oh, I’ll think they’ll do all the work for us. They were so eager to find ways to speed things up, you know? Slow and steady wins the race, at least when-“

Ging was already asleep. 

. . . 

Killua swerved their car into the lot and threw off his seatbelt. Not his best parking job, but it would have to do. They'd reached the next closest airfield. Killua wasn’t sure it hadn’t been fortunate that Leorio and Kurapika had gotten to the other airfield before they did. He’d smelled enough smoke to know that there were at least some mechanical issues going on with that plane. 

Together they raced onto the grounds. This really was a nicer-looking establishment- trimmed grass, hedges, the look of a high society club. A fence surrounded what looked to be the main building. They ran until they reached a man at a desk outside, complete with flowers. He held a shiny set of keys.

“Sir,” Killua started breathlessly. “Is the pilot in? We’re really in a hurry.”

“Oh, he’s in, alright.”

“Can we see him?”

The man eyed them. “How old are you kids?”

“I’m eighteen.” Killua didn’t miss a beat. He laughed. It probably only sounded a little forced to Gon. “People always tell me I look young for my age.”

“Mmhmm.” The man turned to Gon. “And you?”

“I-“ Gon started. 

“Sir,” Killua cut him off. ‘I’d appreciate it if you didn’t hold us up any longer.” He reached into the pocket of his grimy sweatshirt and pulled out a handful of bills. The man’s eyes widened. But then he looked very closely at Killua’s face. “Hey, you look kind of familiar. Have you been on tv, kid?”

Killua paled. Gon decided it was time to step in and do what he did best. 

“Oh my god!” he yelled. He pointed up and behind the man. When he turned to look Gon grabbed Killua’s hand, snatched the keys, and knocked one of the flowerpots off. Together he and Killua ran and jumped the fence.

“Subtle!” Killua yelled. 

“It worked, didn’t it?”

They sprinted around the side of the building to the door. One of the keys fit neatly into the lock, and the door opened creakily. The room inside was beautifully furnished, expensive- and empty. 

“What in the hell,” Killua groaned. They split up to inspect the room, and had almost given up hope when Gon tripped over the body on the floor. 

“Aaa!”

“Gon!”

“What the…where am I?” said a new voice. A man with long silver hair and a cap pulled over low over his eyes pushed himself up. He looked blearily at Gon and Killua. 

“Huh. Who are you kids? I was out so late last night-“ he yawned. 

“Mmhmm.” Killua threw a sideways glance at Gon, who seemed pretty much unconcerned that their prospective pilot was at most half conscious at the moment. Gon took a deep breath. 

“Mr-“

“Kite.”

“Mr. Kite, we need a pilot to fly us as close to Santa Rosita as we can get. Our…”

“Grandma,” Killua supplied.

“Our grandma is sick and we’re got to get to her.”

Kite yawned. “Yeah, sure.”

Gon and Killua shared an incredulous look. 

“You don’t want to know where our parents are?” Killua sounded almost hopeful. “Kinda weird, you know…two kids…taking a flight…no identification, no supervision?”

Kite pulled himself off the ground with a bit of difficulty. “We’re cool,” was his only response. “Be at the plane in ten minutes?”

Not wanting to look a gift horse in the mouth, they agreed.


End file.
